When Christians Disagree
It’s no secret that Christians sometimes don’t get along. Like in all human relationships, conflict is inevitable, normal, and expected. But what happens when Christians sharply disagree on matters of practice and preference?
Just to be clear, I’m not talking about the essentials of faith summed up in various creeds and statements of faith. When I say practice and preference, I mean stuff like this: your church has communion every Sunday; we do it once a month. You follow a formal liturgy; I’m a little more spontaneous in a worship service. I like hymns, you like contemporary Christian music. You like this preacher; I prefer someone else. And so it goes.
But Christians can sharply disagree on these matters of practice and preference. In fact, these divisions can form entirely new denominations, alienate close friends, and present a black eye to an observing secular world.
So tucked in between the Jerusalem Council in Acts 15 and the second missionary journey in chapter 16 is this story of two shining lights of the early church, Paul and Barnabas, who were at odds with each other. As we’ll soon see, both men may have been right in their assertions and actions. Let’s look at Acts 15:36-41.
Paul and Barnabas, both godly and committed disciples, agreed on the mission ahead of them (15:36)
This is a natural response (returning to help these young churches) to the remarkable success these men experienced on what’s called the first missionary journey which began and ended in Syrian Antioch, Acts 13:2 and 14:26-28. The mother church in Jerusalem recognized this explosion of Gentile converts as a God thing, a fulfillment of Scripture. Their resulting letter in Acts 15:22-29 is a marvel in its encouragement and simplicity. No wonder Paul and Barnabas were excited to return to these churches! They understood the need for follow-up and further discipleship of these new converts and churches. No email or Zoom or cell phones in the first century. Discipleship was, and is, a personal endeavor.
But Paul and Barnabas disagreed on how it should be carried out (15:37-39a)
As you may remember, it says as a matter of fact in Acts 13:13 that John (also called Mark) left the men early on during their first trip. Maybe he was homesick? Maybe he was sick? The fact remains he left them. Barnabas wanted to take him, to give him a second chance. Paul believed Mark had “deserted them” (Acts 15:38).
And here we have a fundamental difference between the two men.
At the risk of oversimplification, as leaders, Paul was perhaps more mission-minded and task oriented; Barnabas was more people centered.
There’s a lot of research on this. Here’s a summary statement from one website:
“Task-oriented leaders focus on the objectives and what they need to accomplish them. People-oriented leaders focus on the well-being of the people performing those tasks, with the tasks taking a back seat.”
Barnabas focused more on people. In Acts 4:36-37, he sold a field and gave the proceeds to the apostles to meet the physical needs of people in Jerusalem. In Acts 9:26-27, he stuck his neck out by vouching for Saul (soon to be named Paul), a former persecutor of the church, now a firebrand for the gospel. In Acts 15, Barnabas wanted to give his young cousin, John Mark, a second chance, to restore his confidence, to allow him to mature.
But sometimes people-oriented leaders can become people pleasers. In Galatians 2:11-13, Paul confronts both Peter and Barnabas when they cave to peer pressure from their fellow Jews when they no longer eat with the Gentile believers in Syrian Antioch.
Paul on the other hand was more task oriented. He’s the big picture guy. The type A personality that’s almost driven to accomplish. He has big plans. He is, after all, the apostle to the Gentiles. He got things done. For example, in Romans 15:23-28, he talks about preaching in Spain, the other end of the Mediterranean world. No wonder he was so opposed to having Mark rejoin the team (Acts 15:38). The task was too important to allow someone like him who failed them before to do it again.
But sometimes task oriented people run over others to achieve a goal.
And it’s no wonder these men “sharply disagreed” (“irritated” in the original) to the extent they went their own way. To put it mildly, they didn’t leave on good terms.
But both men may have been right in what they did! And the NT proved this to be true (15:39b-41)
Barnabas took Mark to his home in Cyprus. Paul replaces them both with another team member named Silas. And it initially sounds like Paul is the hero in this story. In Acts 15:40b-41, the church in Antioch commissions them. We read about Paul’s journeys in the rest of Acts. We don’t see the outcome of Barnabas’ ministry with Mark until the end of Paul’s earthly life.
Ten or so years later Paul writes from prison in Colossians 4:10: “My fellow prisoner Aristarchus sends you his greetings, as does Mark, the cousin of Barnabas. (You have received instructions about him; if he comes to you, welcome him)”. Something has happened in the years since Paul and Barnabas separated. Mark has been restored to fellowship with Paul. In 2 Tim.4:11 where Paul is imprisoned for a final time before his death, we read this: “Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, because he is helpful to me in my ministry.”
How fortunate Mark was to have Barnabas in his life! Barnabas seems like a person who doesn’t give up on a person when they fail. How we need a person like that in our lives. Someone once said we need a Paul to mentor us, a Barnabas to encourage us, and a Timothy to disciple. Where would we be without these kinds of people to help us grow in Christ?
To be honest, we need leadership that’s both people oriented and task oriented. In this story, both men proved to be right in their actions.
The title of this blog post is “When Christians Disagree”. Here’s some final thoughts when the inevitable happens:
Let’s disagree on issues that really matter. For example, I have strong convictions on many matters of practice and preference. But I’m not going to break fellowship with someone over them unless they choose to break with me.
Let’s disagree without being disagreeable. Too many Christians borrow the tactics of the world and firebomb their brothers and sisters in Christ.
Finally, while we may believe we are right, let’s be humble enough (like Paul) to recognize when God works through others (like Barnabas) with whom we have differences.
I’ll leave you with two Scriptures regarding relationships:
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” Romans 12:18
“Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.” Hebrews 12:14-15
It’s inevitable that Christians will disagree. But it’s how we handle conflict that will demonstrate how closely we follow Jesus.