Finding a Way Home
As a young boy I loved maps. Still do. For me, African maps were the best and seemed all the things my suburban surroundings were not: exotic, mysterious, dangerous and enticing. I imagined central Africa as nothing but jungle and filled with head-hunters, snakes and wild beasts. Little did I know how varied and wonderful the land and the peoples are in the region.
A few years ago, Claudia and I traveled with a team of educators to Rwanda in order to train teacher-trainers. As you probably know, Rwanda in the mid '90s endured a horrific 100 days of genocide where an average of 10,000 people died each day, and hundreds of thousands of women raped. We learned that of the million killed, only 20% died by gunfire; the rest perished close-up and many by their neighbors and former friends. This was tribal and ethnic terror, Hutu vs Tutsi. We came just a few years after this horror, and there were still plenty of people we met who lived through it all.
Yet, in the time we spent in Kigali we sensed sadness, but no overt animosity toward those who had a hand in the atrocities. Rwanda, as a whole country, determined that if they were to go forward as a nation, they had to go through the conflict, not wish it away. Wholesale retribution would neither bring back the dead nor enable a future. We learned international criminal tribunals and national criminal courts dealt with the planners and leaders of the genocide, but locally, small village truth and reconciliation councils were established, called Gacaca (pronounced Ga-Cha-Cha). These were where neighbors could confess their wrongdoings and ask for forgiveness and restoration. People who took part in the killings and victim's families faced each other and did the hard work of rebuilding bridges. It was not perfect but it began the healing process that, ultimately, everyone wanted. Those we encountered, though wounded, loved their land and the people in it, and that was worth letting go of the anger and walking away from vengeance to embrace peace. I recall one person saying they had to find a way home.
This is a picture of a Gacaca where the village hears from and locally elected judges determine what to do with the accused man.
Claudia and I traveled to Rwanda to help them, and we did, but we returned changed through what we saw and learned. Reconciliation is the hardest best way to deal with conflict. Reconciliation brings together those for whom circumstances have driven apart. Reconciliation became a precious word to me, and I discovered anew, to God, as well. Listen to Paul in 2 Corinthians 5:
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation.
The Father drew you out of your darkness and into his light. Jesus loves you in your mess and mistakes and builds a new you in you, more each day. The Spirit walks with you and prompts you to be your best self in every situation. And...then this has been given to you as a message, a ministry, a calling. You and I are to walk this new life in our world and invite others to be reconciled to God, themselves. Paul finishes his thought this way:
We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God.
As I think about this, three sides emerge from the idea of a ministry of reconciliation. The first is clear from the quote above. Traveling through life, followers of Jesus are to live on the lookout for natural opportunities that open up to talk about our story of lost and found, then to extend that offer of life to others. No coercion or manipulation, just explaining God's interest in every heart is to be reconciled to him through the work Jesus did while among us. That defines mission, don't overthink it.
The second aspect deals with folks doing reconciliation work for others. Peacemakers. On occasion we find ourselves as close observers to relationships tearing apart. The ministry of reconciliation is delicate work and done with care can result, for people in conflict, finding new paths forward rather than walking away from it all. This is hard work and not something to rush to with bags full of advice, but through prayer and listening well, providing tools for those involved to get closer together. Some are far more gifted in this than others. If that is you, sharpen your skills. If not, stay out of it.
The third looks a bit like a Rwandan Gacaca. For some reason being reconciled to God seems easier than burying a grudge we nurture against another person. Personal hurt or loss or disloyalty can become a label that defines both the offender and the victim, and limits the ability to move on, in spite of the harm done. Reconciling with a person doesn't ignore wrongdoing but it does carry a cost. All involved must let go of whatever anchor has been dragging them down. Let go of bitterness. Let go of a demand for payback. Let go of excuses. Let go of whatever is harbored that keeps one stuck. And that is a high price to pay, but freedom waits on the other side. Often, like in a Gacaca, a third party is needed. A wise counselor is a good choice.
Like that Rwandan friend, we, too, often need to find a way home, first with a God who is waiting to welcome us, and then with others. Since we all have been, are now, or will be at a juncture where reconciliation is called for, let's pray for one another to find that way all the way home.
How about some music...
...and a funny for the week:
A parts manager for a small tool repair shop, had occasion to order part No. 669 from the factory. But when he received it he noticed that someone had sent part No. 699 instead.
Furious at the factory's incompetence, he promptly sent the part back along with a letter giving them a piece of his mind.
Less than a week later, he received the same part back with a letter containing just four words: "TURN THE PART OVER."