Life Together
Once a month I gather with a bunch of old coaches down at the D and D for breakfast. My former boss, the retired head football coach at Bend High, reaches out to other guys who are done working and live in Bend. We are from all over the region. High school and college guys who ended up here assemble and I try not to miss it. I enjoy these get-togethers and recently we had 17 men who talked loud and laughed louder and shared life for a couple of hours, taking center stage in a local's bar. Times like these remind me of the important role community plays in our lives, and how alone and lonely life can be without a tribe to do life with.
An interesting aside: When I rode my bike across the country I would have a 2nd breakfast most every day. I'd pick out a "mom 'n pop" diner and dive into my eggs, hashed browns, bacon and a pancake, and watch the crowd. In almost every joint and in every town from Virginia to Oregon, I found groups of men (and occasionally women, but not often) sitting comfortably with coffees and food and walking together through the 4th Quarter of life. Ingrained in us lies a desire for a group, a tribe, a band of brothers. I saw this with coal miners in Kentucky, to city guys in St. Louis, to farmers and ranchers from Nebraska all the way home. The constant was this simple gathering that grew to mean so much.
When I travel with a group I do better, and we do better. The book of Hebrews gets at this when the writer says,
"Let us not forsake the gathering of ourselves together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging each other, and all the more as we see the day drawing near."
I recall, as a new follower of Jesus while in high school, when a speaker used what I later learned was an old illustration to highlight the need for fellowship. We had gathered around a fire and he nudged one burning branch away from the pile. As he talked, the branch lost its bright fire-light and cooled and soon just smoldered. He pointed out the obvious: Without a group to encourage and to challenge and to comfort, our faith-life can cool and our spirit lose its fire. We are better together, so over and over the scriptures remind us to do the hard work toward building unity as we walk together.
The outflow of that verse in Hebrews is to encourage each other, and all the more, the author says, as we see the day drawing near. This "day" might be the day when Christ returns, but could just as easily be our own "day" when we are all done here on earth...and with each birthday, the closer that day looks! Together we can encourage, while alone we are vulnerable to discouragement. Encouragement goes way beyond slaps on the back and atta-boys. Together we build courage into one another as we travel along, facing our personal battles.
Ponder a moment how this translates to most folks who are increasingly isolated by technology and a society driven apart by a virus and given cold comfort from social media. We have never been so connected to the world and so distanced from others. It takes effort to connect. It demands time to invest in others. On top of this, groups are often...well...difficult to hang in with. Churches and fellowship groups are populated with broken, hurting, insensitive, odd, hypocritical and sometimes unpleasant people. People in process... (after all, we are to be more like a hospital than a museum). If truth be told, people much like us. The easiest thing to do when times get tough is to bail on the church or breakfast group and walk away, alone.
But squint a bit to see any group of believers you regularly meet with as a foundry where the heat of discussion and disagreements and the commitments to hang in with one another act like fire and hammers and anvils where we are formed into more of what we hope to be. In those spaces, the proverb proves true that says,
"As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another."
Even though in the sharpening there will be sparks and heat, therein lies the power of a group who desire to be better. Sometimes, folks just meet, whether Sunday morning or 6am at Jake's, and not much happens. Other times, lives are changed, hearts given courage, spirits lifted. And in times of need, we have a tribe to lean on. We are better together.
Ponder if this is the year to form or fold into a group. It may be in your church or from work days or your neighborhood. Intend to make the time free, not scripted. A great place to return to again and again is some version of, "So, tell me your story." There is always much to tell and much to learn from one another as we allow space for the Spirit to work in and through each person. The truth is that we are, indeed, better together.
And...some music for the week.
...and a chuckle for the day
A zookeeper spotted a visitor throwing $10 bills into the elephant exhibit…
“Why are you doing that?” asked the keeper.
“The sign says it’s okay,” replied the visitor.
“No, it doesn’t.”
“Yes, it does. It says, ‘Do not feed. $10 fine.'”